i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Randomize
