OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
