i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
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