Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
Randomize
