Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize
