It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
Randomize
