i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Randomize
