So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
3pm strippers are depressing
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
