He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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