I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
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