we'll go far in life on tits alone.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Randomize