Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
Randomize
