he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
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