I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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