My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
that is very illegal...i love you.
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