He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize
