K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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