you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
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