I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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