Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
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