whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
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