Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Randomize
