Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
Randomize
