He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
Randomize
