I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
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