i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
Randomize
