'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
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