the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
The ass gains better be worth it
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
