I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize