You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
We named our party play list daddy issues
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
i need some magic done to my vagina
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Randomize
