OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
YAS. BRING CRAB.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
Randomize
