you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
