bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
Randomize
