I think i peed on brittanys purse
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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