White coat. Heels.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Randomize
