strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
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