Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
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