Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
Randomize
