so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
