My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Randomize