just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
I am mentally ready for anal.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Randomize
