Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
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