I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
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