I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
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