my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Randomize