it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
Randomize
