I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
