Say something about gay babies.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Randomize
