So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Randomize
