You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
Randomize
