Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
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