dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
Randomize
